Emperor’s new clothes: Apple pulls biggest heist of the year by selling something that doesn’t exist

Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.

While fool may be too strong a word, Apple surely has gone hard on marketing to sell us on something that isn’t quite ready yet: Apple Intelligence, the company’s assortment of artificial intelligence features.

There’s nothing dishonest about promising features that are a work in progress. Companies do it all the time. But to center your whole marketing campaign around something that won’t fully be ready for showtime until next year really takes some guts.

Apple first did this in September when it announced the iPhone 16 series. It said the phones were built from the ground up for Apple Intelligence, despite a rumor suggesting it never originally planned to incorporate AI features into the phone.

And now, it has announced another product “built for Apple Intelligence,” the iPad mini.

Again, since Apple Intelligence is on its way, Apple didn’t exactly make a misleading claim by touting the new small tablet as being perfect for the AI era. However, the only special thing about the iPad mini is the promised suite of AI features.

It looks the same as the last iPad mini, which came out in 2021. It features the same screen specs, the same camera hardware, and the same sensors as the model it’s replacing.

The two noteworthy hardware upgrades are the A17 Pro chip and 128GB of storage. As you may have guessed, the improved performance specs will help the device run AI features smoothly.

That’s not to say the only reason the iPad mini features the A17 Pro is support for AI. After all, the prev-gen mini also came with a chip that was cutting-edge for its time.

However, my main point stands: if Apple wants to sell a product (or two) on the strength of a feature, the feature should be ready to go when it’s announced.

Granted, Apple Intelligence will be here in a few days, but it will only be the first installment of capabilities. The more exciting features won’t arrive until the end of the year and the rollout will only conclude in March.

With its overemphasis on unbaked AI features, Apple is only showing us that not only are the recent hardware improvements nothing to write home about, but its software strategy is also a mess.

What’s more, Apple’s ardent fans don’t seem to care that the functionalities the company has promised aren’t ready yet. Others, specifically users in China, will be waiting indefinitely for them. Yet, the iPhone 16’s sales are starting to show promise.

Perhaps Apple can get away with anything as long as its cult followers are behind it.